F1

Acid in his red Ferrari, is now leading the pack by nearing one full lap.He had a good start or more like a jumpstart,he throttle up his engine before the race even begin.Since there's no rule in this race,his move is a legal one.YP and Xiao in their HentaiHyundai and Mitsubishi Evo VII respectively were engaged in reverse gear at the start,thus allowing Acid to lead by more than 5 full laps by the end of 20 laps in this race of 31 laps. At the end of lap 20th,Xiao,YP and the rest of the Lamers' pack realise that they have been in reverse gear all this time while Acid seem to be cruising for his 201st career first place finish in the IMU Lamers' Championship M2/03. Acid has claimed the number one spot in the Foundation 1 although he had a wing damage in Foundation 2,causing him to finish behind Xiao.Now back to the race,Xiao and YP finally shift into their forward gears at the start of 21st lap in this CVS circuit.Acid has just lapped them for the 5th time in the last lap. Since there's nothing to lose,Xiao began his ascent in the drivers' standing by engaging his Nitrous Oxide system of his Mitsubishi Evo VII.He knew the risk of running the system for the last third of the circuit.He could either blow his engine due to the Nitrous Oxide generating excessive strain on the engine of his Evo,or get a good standing or even better finish ahead of Acid.He could only hope and pray for the latter two.He weaved in and out,overtaking Mr. Selfish at the Chicane of Pharmaco in his 25th lap,with a breath-taking "speeding through the pit stop" maneuver.Since the pit stop was a straight instead of the Chicane of Pharmaco where other cars need to slow down greatly to navigate it,Xiao was able to get a good half lap gain on Acid.He narrowly avoided crashing into the Mr Antiarrhythmic,one of the directors of the CVS circui,who stood out proudly in the pit stop.WTH is that idiot doing in the pit?Travelling at Mach 2(approximately 2160 km/h) with that idiot standing 61 metres away before Xiao caught the sight of him,with human reponse time of 200 milisecond,putting some of the 100 metres Olympic sprinter to shame,he adjusted his steering and managed to avoid Mr Arrhythmic by hair breadth. On the other hand,YP switched her Super Hengtai mode of her NO system in her Hyundai and began her climb in the standing.Where was YP when Xiao was on his NO system?YP was on the track.So the question was where was Xiao when YP was on her NO system?Xiao don't use the tracks,he raced through dirts and barriers as always. A few more laps down,Xiao and YP got Acid in their sights.Seeing them,Acid engaged his NO system too.Compared to Xiao and YP's constant uses of their NO system,Acid's NO system still need a lot of finetuning and upgrade.Coming out of the 180 degree sharp turn at Vessels of the Limbs into the last lap,Xiao was still smelling the exhaust of Acid's Ferrari.The white flag was up.That was the final lap.Can Xiao improve his standing?Can he beat YP and so many others in front of him?Can he wrest the pole spot from Acid?Check back later for further updates and news.Same time same channel. Xiao_zhai over and out.Blogging from the cockpit of his car going into the last lap of the CVS circuit.

Friendship

For the past 3 hours or so,I have logged into www.friendster.com and browsed through my old friends profile and all.I didn't add most of them,they are just connected to my friends who happen to know them as well.In real life,I do know them.I wonder how much I have missed out with my old friends,those from secondary and primary schools.I still remembered their names,their truants,their personality then. I looked at them now,judging from their pictures that are available,most of them have grown up to be beautiful ladies and handsome gentleman.Any other things about them,I am absolutely lost as in events in their current life,where they are studying,what they are doing,hobbies and all.Some of them,I practically last say hi to them in a decade ago.Yes,a decade ago,you got that right.That's where friendster find its niche.To bring those friends of ours that we have lost contact with.To a certain extent,it works but for a student like me who have difficulty travelling around and having limited pocket money,the geography limits what I can do to catch up with my friends. It is nice though to know that they are doing fine in their life.I give them my blessing.Normally I don't add them to my friends' list.Why?Reasons being this guy whom I remember(and last say hi is like a decade ago), will he remember me or not?I am always proud of my memory power but sadly,there are people whose names I have already forgotten even in IMU,lest to say friends from my primary and secondary school years, especially those who don't have anything in common to do with me.Sorry to say that but I admit it is the truth. Sometimes, this friendster phenomenon,I feel is contributing partly to my guilt and realisation that friends are just transient,unlike family.I come to realise that in one and a half year time,I may have to or will lose touch with people I knew well in IMU,just as what has happened in my primary and secondary years due to the nature of geography and our studies.So far,there is one I am and definitely have been proud of is my friendship with a close friend of mine whom I have known and studied with since kindergarten.This friendship is kept well partly due to the fact that we have been practically in the same class since kindergarten.In one and a half year time,when each of us will be going our own way to further our study,hopefully I will be proven wrong for once,that friendship is transient.... I would like end this blogtry with a toast of Vodka to my divebuddy in Pulau Tioman,Acid.I have only known him practically 3 months ago......you guys in IMU don't believe?Ask him......

Biasedness and Racism(PROCEED WITH EXTREME MATURITY AND CAUTION)

The net is a powerful tool to state your honest(sometimes dumbright silly)opinion.The issue of the racial gap has resurfaced in one of the blogs I came across.Since I have much to say,I guess it will be better if I dedicate a blotry(blog entry?) to it. I think I mention before in my previous blog that our education system needs a revamp.Basically it is the policy that was discreetly(read unwritten;unspoken;say-it-you-will-minum-kopi-with-ISA ppl)undertaken by our government in awarding university places and scholarships to undeserving one.What do I mean by undeserving one?People who score well in examination yet rich enough to own a Mercedes Benz 500S don't deserve the full scholarship.People who don't score as well as those "lucky 128" yet got the places in the universities,they too don't deserve this.And maybe less heard,people who belong to the top 50 scorers in STPM in the country yet can't get his/her first choice of study.Maybe there are other criterias that are to be examined before one is admitted into the university or awarded a scholarship.For example,in the matter of scholarship awarded,the finances of the family should really be closely scrutinised before the award.A scholarship offer is a good way to reward a student for his/her achievements,that,I agree but I guess a 50% scholarship will do and the money "saved" can be used to sponsor those good students who are not financially able,not necessarily at tertiary level,but also at secondary,primary and pre-school.I personally feel this should be the case as to reinforce the the stand that everyone should be given an equal (or close to equal)chance at the best possible education. As for placement of university,I wonder what the considerations are.Distance from the applicant's hometown and availability are the common reasons given.Of course,the applicants would have taken the location of the university into consideration when putting their first choice of university.If you are one of the top 50 scorers in a national level exam and you can't get the first choice of study,the first thing that should come to mind is "There are only 49 places offered in the university"(Ok...lame joke) but instead of that,the first thing that comes to my mind now is the selection process must have been tampered by unknown force or a biased policy. As for entry into university,I am all for a national-level university entry test for there are basically two different systems currently that allow the students to enter public tertiary education institutions.As far as I am informed,the 2 systems are quite different,one incorporates internal assessment which can be really biased at times or open to biasness and one that doesn't.I am opting for a more reliable and objective assessment which is minimally affected by human's idiosyncrasies.However,I can't say for certain in the terms of the interview that are being carried out for public university entry for I have not enough information.Thus,I reserved my comments here until I have learned more about it. Our education system in my opinion,is the culprit behind all the racial gap.One person,let's say A feels he/she is better(in all fields) and academically more qualified than the B.A nd B get to know each other albeit not for long.However,B got into the university and course that A wants to get in due to some reasons which remain unknown to A.That's when dissent starts to sow in A.A then seek solace with his close group of friends who are normally of his own race.Coincidentally,a few of his friends too experienced the same thing as A.Thus,they start to recall and review where they went wrong in the whole process until someone shout out a similiarity,"They are of B race(coincidentally).That's why.Didn't you notice the trend?"Human being human,tends to look for fault most of the time in others when things go wrong.It is a primate defense mechanism.After all,A and his friends are human too.Soon words got around A's circle of friends,then,from one circle to another to another.......The story changes from bad to worse everytime it is mouthed.What an unfortunate coincidence that they(B's race) are of the same race!There,you got the seed of the racism! Review the events above.What is the thing that set A on a path to resent B's race?The fact that A doesnt' get the university of his choice without any sensible explaination provided.Maybe if someone can really provide him with a straightforward(probably brutal) answer,things would not have unfolded as the way it is above.It doesn't happen.Why is B accepted?He may have been outstanding,rising to the occasion in the interview(if there's any).B may have connections in the university(read underhand method) B maybe the son/daughter of some big shots.If the admission into university has been transparent and fair(seems to be not at the moment to me),racism will not have reared its ugly head.The situation is not going to get better especially when you hear some people known to you are complaining about not their low qualification but "kulit-fication."(This is not coined by me,I swear)The story of A and B still goes on and now comes in many different version and in different fields now including commercial and industry. Policy should be fair and should be as unfavoring as posibble,should not be outright biased if we are to live in a multiracial community.You favour one,you offend every other one. My 2 cents OMG OMG...I am going to get screwed for this post Anyway,guys if there's any comment,please put them as politely as possible.

Things I learn today

Things I learn today: 1. Never go swimming when you feel that something is not right with your body 2. Remember not to breathe in the water withour SCUBA equipment. 3. Don't ever blog when you are sick 4. You know you are sick when you are wearing a sweater,a T-shirt,trainer and socks with no fan on and a blanket over you,yet you still feel cold. 5. In contrast to number 4, you are never too sick to blog. 6. Medical students can approximate what's wrong with him/her yet can do nothing about it. 7. Lastly,medical students preach about going to the doctor instead of self-remedy,yet I myself always choose not to see a doctor until it is really beyond my tolerance level. Self diagnosis: Nasal discharge : Colourless Heart rate : 84 beats per min while resting (around 70 is the normal beat for me)Larynx : Red/inflammed Cough : Yes Current medication: Strepsil(Xtra strong) Duration : Nearing 1 day Temperature : Higher than normal(refer to statement number 4) Sneezing : Yes Time to see doc : Not yet Possible causes : Overusage of credit card for the past few days(nearing 150 bucks on food and movies),overentertainment Main worry : Lectures note piling up for 2 weeks already Main problem : It is never warm enough

Drive behind "Dog-torship"

What drives us to become a doctor?I have been asked a lot of times and I also have asked others a lot of times especially the last batch of juniors who came in in the last intake.What inspires us to become a doctor?Maybe a more relevant question here is what drives me to become a doctor? Frankly speaking,I have no ready answer for this.I can tell you that I want to help people (but I really didn't do much voluntary work since secondary school).I want to cure the world of all diseases(yet I am not very keen on research).I want to lessen the suffering of the people and etc.I guess it is all right for most of us to live a dream.After all,that's where most breakthroughs in mankind are derived from.These are some of the few common reasons.Along the line,some "budding aspiring medical students" will say "It's my Dad/Mum/girlfriend/boyfriend/brother/sister/dog/cat/hamster/rabbit's choice so I just follow them" ,"Being called a doctor rather than Encik/MakCik/Mr/Mrs/Miss/Lin Peh/Lin Bu/Nyiamah/Nyiapah and etc is great/fun/cool/grand/shiok/damn respek...." and etc. Today, I went to a Pusat Kesihatan, an outpatient government-run clinic to do my clinical visit.The doctor was friendly at first,talking to us,the medical students while he was attending to his patients.But as the day went on and more cases coming in,he seemed to lose his composure.Grumbling every now and then to himself,the nurses and at us,the medical students.There was supposed to be another doctor at the clinic but she was on leave.Thus,he had to handle the work of two persons and us while drawing the same salary.(I suppose)Together with a few very frustating cases,he finally went into hypertension mode.Keep grumbling and complaining of his work even in front of the patients.He tried to keep a cool head but it seemed that the stress was winning the war. Yet,though it may seemed unprofessional at times,he still did his work,going through each patient's pathologies thoroughly before prescribing carefully.At the end of day,at lunch break,he probably had seen at least 70 cases(judging by the number attached to each patient's files)Quite a feat I thought, for some of the patients were really difficult people who kept nodding their heads as if would heed the doctor's advice yet we knew as medical students and personnels if they had followed the doctor's order,they wouldn't be coming back to the clinic anymore.Patient's non-compliance.Very difficult case to handle.You want to help the patients,but they patients are not appreciating it.No wonder the stress and blood pressure of the doctor kept going up (just like taxes) until it reached breaking point. Then at lunch break,he asked "Kenapa nak jadi doktor?Kerja susah tau,gaji rendah.Kenapa tak cari kerja lain?Lagipun,tak de masa untuk anak."I guess this is a very common complaint among the overworked and underpaid government health personnels.Feel like asking him why did he stay in the government sector when the privates sector was a better gold mine.Of course,with such volatile mood,I guess it is better to keep my mouth shut. A lot of people are crying for the increase of the wages of government health personnels yet the government has done nothing much about it and keep postponing the review.Even if there's increase,it will be an insignificant one.Why is that so?I think if we look further into the matter at hand,we can point out the reason.The primary function of government's health service is to provide as much medical coverage as possible for the whole population.The secondary function will be to provide employment for the medically trained personnels. Doctors exist because of patients.Not the other way round.Therefore,we must get as many patients as possible into the healthcare service before anything beneficial can be done.Not to get as many medical personnels as possible to stay in the public sectors.To achieve this high patients population's access to the healthcare service,the thing that comes into mind first which influence the patients' accessibility to healthcare service is the financial state of the patients.This will then decide the price the patients can afford.To make it affordable for the general population,the outpatient treatment is set at only RM 1.00.We all also know that the allocation for the healthcare is not bottomless.The same money is used to buy the medicines,pay the medical personnels,maintain and replace the medical equipments.The allocation to purchase and restock medicine probably accounts for most of the expenditure of MoH.Drugs,especially generic one,are very expensive yet the government clinics are practically giving them free to the patients for the RM1 paid is rarely enough to cover the cost of even a tablet much less a packet of it.Given the volume of patients that government healthcare services entertain,the amount of "losses" incured here is almost insurmountable. If we are to increase the government healthcare workers' pays significantly,this will cause a very huge dent in the allocation to buy medicine.Therefore,either the medicine will run out due to insufficient fund to restock them which will result in patients not being cured or the price of the treatments(outpatients or inpatient) will have to be increased.This will then decrease the accessibility of the patients to the healthcare service which is supposed to be the primary objective of government healthcare,thus indirectly defeating its own purpose which is to cure the patients at the end of day.Thus,we can say that the government healthcare personnels are indirectly subsidising the treatment of the patients by overworking and being underpaid.The fact that they are using and dedicating the limited time they have of their life to save the life of others give their work a nobility unachieved by most if not all other professions. Lastly,the "harsh" working conditions and relatively low pay(compared to private sectors),in my opinion are required for the selection process,selection of those doctors who are willing to contribute their training and skills to the society(more notably the poor poor)and government from those who are out for self-gain.The working conditions and the low pay function as the selection pressure in the selection of the doctors who are really sincere in doing their jobs in the government sector.Of course,some of them might be forced to turn rogue due to the intensive selection pressure.I have to admit we are not living in the ideal world yet we still have to live it.If the world is really ideal,patients won't die from their diseases....... At the end of the day,why do I want to become a doctor?Maybe if the question is how can I become a doctor,I probably can answer you....... "Be ready to slog for it and don't expect too much out of it" Feel free to state your opinions politely,be it rebuttal or others....

Close shave

Today,I have another shock of my life.Today is the third time I almost drown in water.There are people around the world who are dying due to lack of water.I am,on the other hand,ironically,almost claimed by the very thing which gives life to all the things around the world.Supposed to go swimming with SC but he fallen sick.Thus,I went alone in the morning.Bad choice to swim alone in a depth that is more than your height.No wonder,there's a must for buddy system in scuba diving.Never Dive Alone.And also Never Die alone. What happen at the pool?Had a cramp in the third lane at the depth of 2 metre.OMG...Went down taking a lungful of water.I thought that's it.Kapai-kapai there and the life guard is nowhere to be seen.I don't know how I did it.Normally when you have cramp,you can't move due to the intense pain of the muscle pulling.But a lot of factor affecting pain as I studied in the BullShitBehavioural Science.There is still a lot of unfinished business.Not the time to die,not the time to drown here in this pool,in the absence of people I know.Straining every sinew in my arms and my cramped right leg,I swam under the surface of the water towards the side of the pool.Safety is so near,within sight.How many people had died when safety is so near?Not the time to think of that.Not the time to give up.The water in my lung and nose is really giving me great discomfort.Somehow,I seem to forget bout the water in my lung in and the need to take in a mouthful of air in the water.Impossible?There is a technique called hyperventilation in skin diving which is meant to try to override the brain's signal to the body to take in oxygen.Actually,there is still a bit of air in the lung but the brain's treshold is quite conservative,at least this is what is written in the scuba manual.Maybe determination can do the same thing to the brain. Finally,I reached the side of the pool.I has never felt such an elation to reach the side of the pool before.Coughed out quite a bit of water at the side.Then only I see the lifeguard arriving.Shot me a glance then walk away from me.Rest for 15 minutes out of the pool before diving back in to do a few more laps before I went back. Swimming isn't that dangerous.There are qualified life guard there.Even if you drown,there is duration of 4-6 minutes before permanent brain damage occurs due to hypoxia.CPR knowledge darn.....Why did I panic then?As usual,there is a lot of things not written in the book,things that can only learned through experience. Lesson learnt-Never drown alone..... Enough for the day's post.......

The Silent Hourglass

I just found out 2 days ago,one of my college's friend's close relative has passed away.Sometimes it reminds me of my own fragility and the mortality of the loved ones.Even armed with the knowledge to cure and save, yet death is inevitable.Sometimes,are we just saving life or postponing the inevitable?My friend,I heard,she has flown back due to emergency matters,whether towitness a passing or to attend the funeral,I am not sure.I wonder if she manage to get there before the last breath.If she didn't,did she regret it?I know I will if I ain't there for her last breath.Sometimes,somewhere in me,I hope that she can live long enough for my graduation,sometimes,shamefully,I wish for her passing while in my presence.I don't want not to be able to be there for her last breath.This scenario has been playing a lot of times in my head.Even with a sense of logic and reasons,answer seems to be beyond me.Maybe the constant thoughts are what inspired me to this poem I wrote not long ago "The Silent Hourglass" Deep in me there’s this fear, Never failing to bring me to tears, What will I do if she isn’t here, To see me as a doctor with my fellow peers, Minute by minute, time is slowly, Bit by bit, gaining on her youth silently, She’s aged now yet still lively, Having lived her life dutifully, She has a whole past to reflect on, That goes beyond the time I was born, Often sad, most of the time forlorn, Sometimes a bed of roses but never without thorns. Born a lady with an iron will, Earned a living with her limited skill, Continues to build her family until, One day, she bows to time, not to ill. Fragile she may seem, Yet she still beams, Unlike what others deem, That age has taken her steam. Green roots show in her arms and legs, Her forehead descends like a stair, A skin once smooth now ragged, From life’s wear and tear. If the time does come and thus my fear, A man should shed blood but never tears, But I am no man, I shall tear, For I am a grandson who hold her dear. ~Xiao_zhai~